Saturday, May 16, 2015

The Mayonnaise Blur

Honestly, the next couple of days were pretty much one big blur for me. 

Our doctor started me on magnesium which is basically the equivalent of swimming in boiling mayonnaise. Sounds disgusting and it really was nasty. They put me on magnesium because with the high blood pressure, it helps prevent seizures in case of a sudden spike. I spend the rest of the day Thursday feeling like dump. I do remember getting the first of two steroid injections in my hip. I don't know if I was being a super wimp or just exhausted but I really thought that it was worse than any epidural I've ever received. But I would do anything for our unborn baby. 

Joel and I had both turned into 'slaves of the monitor.' Every 10-30 minutes they were checking my pressures and it was almost like the next reading determined how I was going to feel. After the whole day Thursday and through the night, we decided enough was enough. No matter what, we couldn't control the situation so we had to really shift our fears of the worse into faith and trust that Jesus had everything under control. We had to submit to Christ and 'Anchor' our faith in Him alone. We had to be steadfast in unwavering hope and trust. Even though it was hard, and sad, and scary; we had to constantly remind each other that this is God's plan. Definitely not ours... But we had to trust that He does all things for our good and for His glory. Always. Even when we don't understand. Even when we can't wrap our head around the whole situation. Even when it seems like you can't take it one more minute. Anchor. So during our 4 days in the hospital, we had decided that if this little one were to be a boy, he would be named Anchor Joel. (And if baby was a girl, her name would have been Arrow Jean... Jean for my Grandma Donna). 

Friday morning, we went up to see the high risk doctor for an ultrasound. They wanted to see how big baby was and to make sure baby had enough fluid. The high risk doctor we saw during our first ultrasounds was out on vacation so his fill in from Texas was here. As he was checking baby via ultrasound, Joel and I were hyper sensitive to everything he was observing. And that's when I saw it. Something I had NEVER seen on an ultrasound before.... I knew in one little look that it was a BOY!  I asked the doctor and he quickly moved the cameras view. Joel didn't believe me (or was too afraid to believe it really was a boy!) but because the doctor neither confirmed nor denied, I knew. We would finally have our son! I still kept that bit of information from the girls though. I still wanted them to be surprised. Even though I was 99% confident in what I saw, I still google searched images of 'boy ultrasounds' - yep, then I knew it was sure. 

Baby looked good. 1 lb 14 oz according to the ultrasound and fluid levels looked great.

Later that day, I got another steroid shot to help develop baby's lungs and brain. I was feeling better on that whole day in Friday so they took me off the magnesium. I was still getting my blood drawn every 6 hours since I was admitted. 

Saturday was great. Joel and I had started planning on me being in bed rest in the hospital for the long haul. The blood pressure meds seemed to be working so I just knew this would be my home for a while.  Once we hit our first goal of staying pregnant for the first 48 hours after the steroid shots, our next goal was 2 weeks, then a month. Rah and every day we kept this precious child safe inside of me was crucial. So we wait...
Even our whole family was willing to wait. Together... With God... We can do anything. 

To be continued.... 

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